Like women sperm
"I don't want sex without sperm": Men talk about the cut in the crotch
"I don't want sex without sperm": Men talk about the cut in the crotch
In theory, the man's ligature is a simple matter. In practice, the vasectomy does not only provoke long discussions among couples. It's about emasculation, late fatherhood, loyalty and irrational fears. The arguments for and against are somewhat questionable. Six men tell.
Renzo Blumenthal did it. He has publicly announced that he will no longer reproduce. After four children, all of them unplanned, the child's blessing on the farm of ex-Mister Switzerland in Vella is over. That's why he went under the knife. Its spermatic ducts were cut, the ends deserted. The Graubünden man paid around 1,000 francs to the urologist for the procedure. «I was able to go home after an hour. I don't regret the operation a bit, "Blumenthal is quoted as saying in" Blick "
The urologist says vasectomy, sterilization of the man is also a problem, castration is what scoffers who have no idea call it. The disruption of the vas deferens is considered to be the safest way to achieve permanent infertility. A small operation for the doctor, a big step for the man. He takes responsibility for contraception in the partnership. Otherwise, more than 90 percent of this is left in the hands of the partner. For women, this means pills, IUDs, hormone sticks, thermometers and arithmetic for years.
The sex doesn't change - the pleasure stays the same
Renzo Blumenthal and with him at least ten percent of all Swiss men think that after they have completed family planning, it is their turn to use contraception. They want to spare their women the hormone clubs or the ligament. Especially since the sterilization procedure for men is much smaller and less problematic than for women. In recent years, clinics and urological practices such as Uromed in Bern have seen increased demand for the procedure. Exact figures are not collected.
In theory, the vasectomy is not a big deal. The sex doesn't change a bit, the effusion just doesn't contain any more seeds, lust and feelings remain the same. In everyday life, however, the discussions about the small cut at the male sanctuary provide material for all of libraries. It is enough to broach the topic once at a party to have the rest of the evening discussion material - among men and women.
Yves, 45, two daughters
Because a vasectomy is not just any intervention, but an operation on the “outstanding symbol of male self-image”, says Yves, for example, and he has to laugh himself at his wording. The 45-year-old father of two daughters dared to make the cut anyway and had himself sterilized 12 years ago. He has never regretted his decision. “When I decided to have a vasectomy, I was 100 percent sure that I didn't want any more children. Not even with a new love. "
Philipp, 35: Without the consent of the woman
Philipp did not even get involved in a big discussion with his wife. A few days after the birth of the second son, the then 35-year-old teacher registered for the vasectomy at the cantonal hospital - without talking to his wife about it. «We always agreed that two children are enough. I've seen too many couples that it only takes a moment of carelessness or fickleness and Zack is a third child. I'm not in the mood for such a straggler. With a vasectomy, the matter is settled once and for all. That saves a lot of discussions. " Since then, he has only regretted it once: when his son asked him whether it was true that dad couldn't have children anymore, but mum with a new husband could.
It is noticeable that those men who are prevented usually have no trouble telling God and the world. It is no longer a taboo because the intervention stands for a modern, partnership-based understanding of sexuality. The vasectomy, it has also become a symbol for emancipated men. Men who control family planning themselves and whose masculinity does not depend on intact sperm ducts. "Since sex has nothing to do with fertility for me, I can enjoy it a lot more," says Yves.
Macho arguments against vasectomy
Meanwhile, for those men who categorically refuse to allow themselves to be prevented, despite a long marriage and after having completed family planning, arguments are a bit difficult. They know that in 2019 their arguments can quickly become antiquated and macho. For example, Jürg, who “just wants to keep shooting in focus”.
Erik, 45: The fear of pain
He sure doesn’t want any more children, but giving up is still out of the question for him. «I am very sure that I would not be able to bear it psychologically. It wouldn't be the same anymore. " He also read about bad side effects on the Internet. "Men who had been in pain for years, whose testicles swelled, turned blue, horrible things." Just the idea of the smallest scratch on their best piece brings a cold sweat to the forehead of many men.
Thomas, 52: "I won't let anything cut me"
Then there are men like Thomas, 52, married, and a daughter who only tells after persistent inquiries that the vasectomy is too permanent for him. “I won't let anything cut through or desolate. Not because I'm afraid for my sexuality, but because I only know for sure at the end of my days that I don't want any more children. "
Thomas expresses what makes many men shy away from the procedure. A vasectomy can theoretically be reversed. In practice, this is not only expensive and time-consuming, but also not always possible. So no cut back. But what if a new, younger woman suddenly appears? A new great love with a new desire for children? With this argument, man naturally maneuvers himself into the sidelines with the long-standing, loyal wife and mother of their children. Very few can express this openly.
Christoph, 41: "With a divorce it would be a disadvantage"
Christoph, Anne's husband, both 41 years old, is such an exception. When his wife no longer wants to use hormonal contraception after the third child, he categorically rejects a vasectomy. The reason: you will soon no longer have any more children anyway, but he will be able to have children for at least 30 years. In the event of a divorce, he would be at a disadvantage when looking for a partner. Clear words that not every partnership can handle.
Markus, 29: "I will never let a child hang on me"
And then there are those men who allow themselves to be prevented so that they never have children in the first place. Markus is one of them. When the software developer wants to have himself sterilized at the age of 29, he first has to convince his urologist. He does not want to perform the procedure on such a young man. But it has always been clear to Markus that he doesn't want any children. "I wouldn't be a good father." He wants to create clear relationships with the vasectomy. «Women constantly have the feeling that they are now the one with whom I suddenly want to have children. If I do not change my mind, they will be offended and blame me for wasting their time. “Since he was stopped, these discussions are gone. "And I'm no longer afraid that another child will be hanged on me after all."
The vasectomy is much more than just a small incision. It is also a promise to the woman that there is no plan B. No second spring, no second family. And for that you might have to praise Renzo Blumenthal a little. It has nothing to do with masculinity and sex, but with love.
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