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I hit my husband

good evening, I think it's pretty unusual, at least that's how I can imagine it, at least the fact is, and to put it quite simply: I hit my husband. I don't want it at all, but it always happens. My husband is much stronger than me, he has given me a slap in the face before, but he was very shocked about it. Now he only turns away when the going gets tough, and I think he drinks more alcohol than before. I guess it's not frustration drinking, but his way of punishing me.
I started beating my husband, got a slap in the face at a party because he looked after another woman. He thought it was rather funny, and there was also a good party mood afterwards - there was no telling what extent it would later assume.
After a while it happened again, this time at home, and that was a real disaster: our child was there, it was at the breakfast table and my husband had spilled jam. This time I hit him in the middle of the nose and blood spurted. Our little one started to cry, my husband was completely stunned and didn't even know what to do, then he went into the garden with the little one.
Of course I apologized, I didn't want to either - my hand just slipped, my nerves were probably tense because of other things.
Then it didn't happen for a while, then suddenly three times a week. Blood never splashed again, and as I said, my husband is much stronger than I am, but he can't help it, he probably has a blockage.
Now he has given me an ultimatum to seek treatment, but I know that I don't really want to hit him, and every time I think, this time it was the last time and that will never happen again.
I do not expect any direct help here - it is just that I will try everything to change this situation.
And maybe writing it down will clear my mind, because of course I want to do something, but I don't like to admit in a consultation: I hit my husband
Britta

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Hello Britta,
you shouldn't think that conjugal violence against men is uncommon.

Violence against men is a major social problem, but firstly, it is not made public by those affected (there may be different reasons for this, the most common being shame), secondly, precisely this topic is not viewed with the necessary seriousness.

As an example, I would like to mention a Coke advertisement that I saw on television.

The central theme is: a man drinks a woman's glass of cola empty, she slaps him on the face - gestures of mutual apologies follow. Spot end.

With this spot, the product cola brings itself close to temperament - that has a positive connotation.
If the scene had happened the other way around - she drinks the cola away from him, he slaps her in the face, if it hadn't been conveyed, then the product would have a proximity to violence, simply unthinkable for an easy-going product

You see, if you want to change something in your behavior, then you have a more arduous path ahead of you than if you were a man and hit your wife. The basic problem with the topic is simply much more difficult to convey.

Nevertheless, if you want to save your marriage, you will not be spared the way to treatment; naming the problem can bring it to the fore, but not solve it.

One who survived

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I got lost here again, in search of this topic I ended up here ... otherwise I would probably never have found it again in the vastness of the web.

An interesting answer, and a lot of truth about it, everyone I talked to about it was just incomprehensible, after all, my husband is of sturdy build, and also not particularly squeamish in life. That probably makes it very unbelievable for everyone.

But .. actually I'm through with the problem, I don't want to say that I'm "cured" now, I'm more afraid of a reaction, because once I got a slap in the face that rang my ear for three days. That didn't really make our marriage happier, it kind of cooks on a low flame.

let's see how it goes on, I have now added the site to my favorites, and will perhaps report again on the progress.
Britta

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Hello
I hope that someone reads this and can help me. It is not now that I hit my husband in the sense of "knocking out" or something. I've known him for ten years now and it has often happened that I only gave him a slap in the air (but there were reasons for that) but unfortunately it got more and more, from pulling hair (very bad) to scratching and beating (however he then in return the same). I don't want that at all and I'm so sorry. Today I wanted to hit him so unhappily - but really without intent - (which was also saumies again) that I probably hit the eye unhappily, which is now getting fat. I'm deeply ashamed, I love him! can you tell me what i can do or who i can turn to? it can't go on like this, I don't want to hurt him. it doesn't happen often either, but unfortunately it does. A small argument, suddenly I raise my hand and hit the head, for example, and then he backs off (but I have the feeling that I'm hit hard because I'm getting into a rage). I feel so bad it's lousy u crap what i do. I want this to stop but apparently need help. many thanks u greeting
kathi

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hello kathi
I also had this problem for a while, but then somehow I got the curve through counseling sessions.

There are regional advice centers, I don't know where you live, so you should find out for yourself which is the most suitable for you.

There are also advice centers at the police for family disputes, but I wouldn't consider that at first. Bodily harm is an official offense, [b] it may be that a criminal complaint must be filed if such an offense becomes known, [/ b] so be careful.

At that time I made good contact via www.ekful.de/, that is the professional association in the Diakonisches Werk - Evangelical conference for family and life counseling. You should perhaps look for the nearest regional position on the website and make an appointment

I wish you luck

the Freiland_weib

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My Olle always screwed me up, and what does it get out of it? I'm gone, and you new one is really against her. I recently saw her with a black eye, ran into a closet, she says - I think we laughed together for the first time.
hofuh

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Good evening,
I don't understand these men who let women beat them. And that several times. Something like this can happen once, but there has to be a real reaction.
I mean, of course I don't want women to be beaten either - of course - but sometimes there is so much to it, children, etc. And women cannot defend themselves. It's usually different with men. They'll be able to defend themselves.
Rosi

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