My hatred of feminism makes me a sexist

Why, as a feminist, I don't have to explain what feminism is to you

I am a feminist. I'm not just a feminist in my closet, I'm a loud feminist. That's why people often ask me what that means - feminism. As with most things, there is no single definition. There is no such thing as just one feminism. That is why many now speak of feminisms. I usually say: “Feminists are committed to equality for people of all genders.” But wait a minute, what about the title of your text, Leonie?

Unfortunately, nobody has ever asked me what feminism is who really wanted to know from me what feminism is. Therefore my answer to this question is actually unimportant. People who want an explanation from me about feminism already have their own explanation. And they want me to accept theirs.

I notice that very quickly. Because instead of asking me, for example, “And how do feminists want to achieve that?” They say “But ...”. And whatever comes after the "but" is not an attempt to discuss feminisms on an equal footing, but an attempt to force me into a spiral of justification. "But Alice Schwarzer!" "But isn't a women * quote sexist?" "But gender asterisks don't do anything!"

I take a position on every counter-argument, take time to refute each one in a differentiated manner. But immediately the next blanket devaluation of feminists and their (perceived) positions comes. Usually it is no longer about the initial question or situation, but rather about venting your own resentment about feminisms. And at some point I am exhausted. So exhausted by this aversion and incomprehension that hits me. And I withdraw. And my counterpart says: “You have no arguments at all! So my opinion about feminism is correct. ”This reveals what it was all about from the start. Not understanding each other and changing society together. But to be right.

I very rarely get involved in fundamental debates about feminisms. Because feminists are chalked up to generalize, while they themselves are generalized. Feminists have to give facts and figures, but then they counter with feeling and “common sense”. Feminists shouldn't get angry even though they are met with so much anger and hatred.

I like to deal with feminisms and discuss them with others. At the same time, in my opinion, as an individual I cannot be expected to immediately have a well-founded opinion on everything that concerns feminisms or what feminists have done or said (should). Then to say “Ha! You see, she has no arguments at all! I'm right! ”Is hard to beat in terms of absurdity and cynicism.

I don't have to make myself available to be cross-examined so that other people can confirm their preconceptions. If someone pretends that what he * she is doing is "discussing" while it is only a matter of wearing down feminists in a loop of justification, then I don't have to go along with it. Because I'm busy saving the world.