What is the psychology behind quitting anger

Why the tears flow when you are angry

Photo: Peter Kramer / NBCU Photo Bank / Getty Images.
There are many moments in life when you don't mind shedding a few tears at all. The heartbreaking ending of Like a single day or the touching speeches at your best friend's wedding won't leave your eyes dry!
But you have probably already found yourself in a situation in which you wanted to sink into the ground because you unfortunately had to start crying. Especially on a particularly stressful day at work or in an argument with your partner, you don't want to burst into tears. Yet it happens that instead of walking out of the room with your head held high, you probably run to the nearest toilet with your head bowed.
Tears of frustration or anger arise when your body functions react to your psychological feelings. “Only humans are able to cry for emotional reasons. This ability continues to develop with age. While babies cry to draw attention to themselves and their needs, from the third month after birth we begin to produce tears even in emotional situations, ”explains Dr. Robert R. Provine, Professor of Psychology and Neuroscience at the University of Maryland. From a social point of view, tears are often a sign that a person is sad, but neither our tear glands nor our brain can differentiate between the many emotions. This may also be the reason why you cry when you are angry, stressed, overjoyed, or sad. “Tears don't say anything specific about your state of mind because they are simply not attuned to it,” he adds.
Dr. Suzanne Degges-White, Chair of the Counseling Department at the University of Northern Illinois, adds that tears are still a healthy way to deal with strong emotions. Crying is a natural coping mechanism that helps you process the frustration you feel. This is how you vent your anger - like it or not. "Crying ensures that you can sort out your feelings and it forces you to take, from a biological point of view, for example deeper breaths, which slows the heartbeat again," says Dr. Degges-White. So while tears of anger are actually very helpful, it is perfectly understandable that they tend to slow you down in the heat of the moment.
The (more or less) bad news at the end: Unfortunately, they are pretty hard to stop. There are some promising tricks you can use to prevent or delay a crying fit, but in the end you should accept this mechanism and be aware of your body's response to emotional situations. In addition, you show your counterpart in this way what situation you are in and that is not a sign of weakness, but also part of our social behavior, emphasizes Dr. Degges-White.